Do you know someone who loves to be first? I don’t mean an athlete in competition or a fan rooting for their favorite team, but a person who always needs control. It’s a regular tendency.

John wrote to a church leader regarding a man named Diotrephes, who loves to be first. Apparently Diotrephes opposed hospitality to traveling believers, and spread malicious rumors about John and his party. Not content in his personal obstruction, Diotrephes threatened kicking those inclined to help out of the church.

A deep need for control twists a leader. Insidious, the one who loves to be first manipulates and confuses. Leaders like this arise in our churches, as we see here, as well as in politics and business and education and all walks of life. Such a leader strangles the passion of others, divides good people and works all situations to benefit himself.

Which makes me wonder—where am I tempted to control situations to my benefit? Where do I love to be first? As I work with people, the temptation to make situations beneficial to myself regularly pops to mind. Occasionally this creates a better plan, but most often I’m simply using others for my pleasure.

It’s worth asking a co-worker if they see this tendency in you (a seriously brave question). Dealing with this impulse before it fruits moves us to healthier places with God and others.

Plus, better than poor Diotrephes, we avoid becoming an object lesson for the next 2,000 years.

Photo by Javier Quiroga